Following the absurd ending bring down the curtain on one of the biggest mediacorp TV productions yet, I found myself often imagining all things Peranakan. The power of the media. Such a scary thing.

Ok anyway, vivid imagination brought upon this tiny idea. The things I learned about Peranakans are that they must always be cheena-fied, from a school of 'traditional' teachings, soft-spoken and submissive. Thus, the link between students from schools like Dunman High and Anglican High and Peranakans.

Taking pride in their 'history' and 'heritage', students from such schools are often well schooled in both English and their mother tongue - Chinese. From what I've observed, the typical school girl is gentle, well-mannered (i wouldn't say submissive, it's derogatory), can speak Chinese well and possesses poise and grace. (Just like Juxiang + talking and hearing abilities.) Of course, there are the bubur-hitam black sheep. These are the loud, wildly over the top ah-lians. The Zhen Zhus in the Peranakan world. Erm.. As for the Kamchengs and Nyonya Kebayas.. I think the uniforms should make up for it. Metal buttons are a symbol of tradition and source of 'pride' for Ah-SIANS and dunmanians

So yeah, if I ever start a parody, I will title it 'The Peranakan Chronicles of a Secondary School Girl' The main advertisement shall be a chinese girl in school uniform smiling in a subtle way at the camera. She will don no Kebayas and hold no Kamchengs. Instead, she will wear her school uniform and hold her Social Studies textbook ala Juxiang holding her yellow Kamcheng. Erm.. I think the Robert Zhangs and Tianbaos are rare and few between so stupid subjects like A maths shall be called Robert Zhang. That way, the Yuzhus can say to their friends. "I was raped by Robert Zhang yesterday." The teachers shall all be called Chenxis. So the students can go "Chenxi bang(1) wo(3) ke(4) fu(2) le(4) Robert Zhang!!" The school song shall be the opening and ending theme songs. Joanne Peh shall be given the honor of singing the school song. (She will have to treat me to dinner first though before I give her sole singing rights. HAHA)

I think it has bags of potential to be a youtube hit! What say you!

It's weird how the above idea seemed perfectly logical to me before I decided to pen it down. Now it seems super idiotic. Oh well.

5:44 am;

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